Typically, when parents of a young man deem him old enough to begin a nascent relationship that would eventually produce grandchildren. They would summon him to request that he should make known to them his 'afesana' (lover). That is if they notice he might have one concealed lover, if however, he doesn't, he would be advised to search around, this includes visiting local streams and rivers or other places where women visit. This act is called Ifojusode.
When he finds one but the lady is playing the hide and seek game, it is called Idẹgiri.
When she has accepted the proposal after frequent visits and gifts and meetings have taken place (meeting here is informal) by both families involved typically parents, it is called Iṣiun.
Formal meeting and asking for the lady's consent (and that of her family) is called Itọrọ.
Itọrọ is repeated but this time around, it is in the eyes of the public attended by families, friends and well-wishers. Lots and lots of traditional gifts are exchanged here and it is called Idana.
Igbeyawo is the actual ceremony that seals the steps, it is very often flamboyant. On this day, the 'Ibaale' tradition is processed by the new couple to confirm she is indeed a whole.
By Baba Adeyemo Adeleye
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